On eye bags, eyeliner, and feeling good about yourself
I’m 28 now, but when I was little, I thought me-at-28 would be wearing heels and holding a briefcase. I thought I’d be putting on a full face of makeup every day. I watched a lot of TV growing up, so my idea of a beauty routine was probably formed by Neutrogena commercials. And teenager magazines. My mom wasn’t into wearing makeup. I wasn’t allowed to wear makeup at all. I didn’t even try eyeliner until I was getting ready for senior prom.
“I wasn’t allowed to wear makeup at all. I didn’t even try eyeliner until I was getting ready for senior prom.”
I think of makeup as a very different thing now. It’s still there when I need it to have fun, but day to day, it’s more about enhancement. I have my set routine that hasn’t changed in years, which means that I can’t leave the house if I don’t have my eyeliner done a certain way, or my mascara or my eyebrow pencil—I just won’t look like me. I put a little bit of foundation on my cheeks, and then I will fill in my eyebrows, do my eyeliner, and use Glossier mascara. And once I do that, I’m good. Sometimes I’ll tweak here and there, but I feel most like myself in this look that I’ve had for the past five years. I’ve gone to photoshoots where people try to fill in my eyebrows and make my skin poreless and perfect, and I feel so not me.
“Beauty means feeling good about yourself, which is so much more complicated than it sounds.”
Beauty means feeling good about yourself, which is so much more complicated than it sounds. Even if you look good, you might not feel good. There are days where I feel icky inside, and no matter how I actually look, I feel like I don’t look good. My beauty routine sets the foundation of my day, and in a way I think that’s why beauty is so alluring.